“Am I ugly?” If you ever try to type those words into a search bar, they are usually the first ones that pop up. In today’s society, there’s an undeniable amount of pressure to look and act a certain way. I’m not even talking about Hollywood or celebrities. While yes, they have the pressure, I’m talking more about us everyday folks.
I am ugly. And no, that’s not to hear protests of the opposite. I mean that in today’s idea of beauty I have always been rated a 7 on my best day. That’s with the right outfit and my hair done and my makeup perfect. On my normal everyday face, I’m a 3. Why the numbers? Because that’s what I’ve been told my whole life.
I’m a huge anime nerd(I mean, why else would I run an anime blog?) and would rather stay home reading and watch anime than go outside and socialize. That’s why, after watching a new anime that a friend suggested, I KNEW I needed to do a review on it.
Now, this anime, Princess Jellyfish, has been out a while already and has even been on Netflix. When I just looked at the cover art, I thought it was just going to be a weird and not that good show.
I couldn’t have been more wrong.
This anime broke my heart, made me cry, and gave me more feels than I could have ever imagined. Any girl(or guy for that matter) will be able to relate to the characters. The best part is that the main character doesn’t change who she is. She stays true to herself while learning who she is.
If you haven’t already heard of Princess Jellyfish, let me give you a brief synopsis…
Ever since her late mother took her to an aquarium when she was young, Tsukimi Kurashita has been obsessed with jellyfish, comparing their flowing tentacles to a princess’s white dress. Now living with five other unemployed otaku women, 19-year-old Tsukimi spends her days as a social outcast dreaming of becoming an illustrator.
However, her life changes forever when one day, a beautiful woman unexpectedly helps her save a jellyfish in a local pet store. From then on, the stranger—confident, fashionable, and the complete opposite of Tsukimi and her roommates—begins to regularly visit the girls’ building. This trendy hipster, though appearing shallow at first, harbors some secrets of her own, starting with the fact that “she” isn’t a girl at all, but a wealthy male college student named Kuranosuke Koibuchi!
Seeing how popular this anime was(it’s ranked #300 on MAL), I couldn’t wait to see how this anime turned out. It’s definitely a slice-of-life anime, and much like Ouran High School Host Club, it does leave off on a cliff-hanger. Luckily, we have the manga which I quickly devoured. I needed a better ending besides what I could find from reading fanfiction for it.
One thing that struck me the most, was how the characters were all otaku’s and not your typically drawn anime-style characters. And the main male character(while cross-dressing and still looked great no matter what he wore), started to fall for our main female character. Despite that, the show didn’t focus on it as much since they decided to go the route of a literal slice of life and not delve as deep as they could into it.
Were the Girls Ugly?
We had a friend over recently and they commented how he and my ex-husband (we’re separated now) never dated girls based on physical appearance. I didn’t say anything, but the comment crushed me. There had been snide comments from others close to me that they would never have to work as hard as me to be beautiful.
Was my worth based more on my physical appearance than my personality?
People would avoid eye contact with me, refuse to be seen with me….was I truly that unwanted? Was I really that ugly? I knew how these girls felt, since I too, was just your average everyday otaku. My social anxiety prevents me from being able to socialize that a “normal” human being and I turn to stone when being asked certain questions. I can fangirl with the best of them, especially when it comes down to things about anime or Harry Potter.
It has been years for me to come to terms with this. I was never going to be a 10 or even an 8. Someone quoted that even when I lost weight, it wouldn’t help because I had an ugly face. Was that my only value of a character? The length of my hair and makeup on my face? Was I unable to be loved because of my face? My first love and boyfriend would ask to see my stomach to see if I was losing or gaining weight. This escalated my eating disorder to even worse proportions and food became my enemy.
One part that struck me especially in Princess Jellyfish, was when Tsukimi was wearing the lace jellyfish dress, it shows two different views. How Kuranosuke sees her and how she sees herself. It’s almost two totally different people. True, he was seeing the version of her that he created, but he wasn’t wrong. She was still herself.
Every girl, and guy, can be beautiful because they already are. We all have a certain style and something to bring to the table.
The show is actually worth watching around the first chance you get. Some of the humor can be charming and unique up to an extent although I hate that it ended on a lousy cliffhanger, which means it’s one of those “read the manga” endings.
There is so much love in my life despite my physical appearance. Beauty isn’t a definition of character. I won’t ever be a model or be showered with compliments all the time. Instead, I’ve been blessed with real and true friends that can see past my imperfections. My friends(the real ones) love my flaws and see me as someone worthy to be loved.
And that’s what really matters.
Until next time my lovelies. As always,